The Midlife of Dudley Chalk is a very unusual romance. A very unusual detective story. A full-length novel for people who like to see the world in a slightly different light. Available as e-book and 9 hour audio book.
Linus Bailey unleashes chaos, danger, and the forces of good and evil when every ridiculous story he's ever made up comes true. Is his absent father really a heroic Ninja Warrior from Yorkshire? Let's find out.
An English researcher believes the world is coming to an end. When two boys in America find a dead body in the road, they begin an investigation that shows he might be right. Why do people, like, sprinkle their speech with, like, the word 'like'? This long short story is soon to be a full-length novel.
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In 1999 I left the shores of England for a new life as an ex-pat. I moved to Corfu, that Greek island made famous by My Family and Other Animals. I ended up with six dogs. It was mayhem, as was every other aspect of life on "Crazy Island," as the mainland Greeks like to call it.
I wrote what would now be described as blog posts about this new adventure, sending them to my publishers to they wouldn't forget me. They proved popular and some of them were published. I decided to lump them all together in an unedited funny, often painful memoir of what it's like to put everything into an old Ford Fiesta and drive off into a new life. |
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I was going to write about an invisible cat. It's a true story too, and we all like true stories about invisible cats. I know, I'll put it at the end. What a showman!
But then something got me thinking about something else. A limp. Isn't it great living on your own? You can do whatever you like. So this limp... Ten years ago I had a problem. Can I really write convincingly to an audience of adults, or does my natural tendency to be flippant ruin it all? It doesn't sound much like a problem, I mean, there's just been an earthquake or two in Indonesia, so struggling with such ethereal concepts as portraying adult themes in fiction isn't something to get too het up a about. But it was a problem for me. Ten years ago I worried about such things (I've got over it). To solve the problem I imagined my audience as children and then I could let go of such silly constraints and have fun. I wrote and wrote and all my fears and woes subsided. I ended up writing a book that adults like. Then I wrote a real book for adults. Go figure, as the Americans like to say. However, I now had a book that adults like but it looks like a kids' book. Is that a problem, I wondered? Would John le Carre have been successful if Tinker Tailor, Soldier Spy was a pop-up book or made from fuzzy felt? I asked the internet. I wish I hadn't. read more... |
Do you want to be a detective, like Dudley Chalk?
Here's your chance. Solve the case and everything I have on Gumroad will be yours... UPDATE! AS of 19/8/18 the number of winners is: 1. You have 499 chances to win, so have a go. Somewhere in the world there's an object. You could go see it of you like. It's there, now, waiting to be found. I'm giving away copies of my books to anyone who tells me what it is. It's not easy. It takes some doing. Do you have what it takes to solve it? Hop on over to the armchair detective page to find out. Becoming a detective saved Dudley Chalk's life. You? Well, there's free books... |
